8 non-obvious signs that someone is a really good person, according to psychology

Determining if someone is genuinely good can be quite challenging, especially when we live in a world where appearances can be deceiving.

Psychology, however, provides us with some subtle, non-obvious cues to help us identify the truly good people amongst us.

Being a good person isn’t just about being nice or friendly. It comes down to deeper, less visible traits.

In this article, I’m going to share 8 non-obvious signs that someone is a really good person, according to psychology. 

Let’s get started. 

1) They’re consistent

Good people aren’t just good on certain days, in specific circumstances or with particular people.

True goodness is about being consistently kind, honest, and considerate. This consistency is one of the reliable signs that someone is genuinely good, according to psychology.

This doesn’t mean they’re perfect – we all have our off days. But if you notice that someone consistently treats people with respect, regardless of who they are or how they can benefit them, that’s a sign of a truly good person.

Psychology tells us that consistency in personality traits and behaviors is an indicator of authenticity. And authenticity is a core characteristic of good people.

If you’re trying to determine if someone is really a good person, look for consistency in their actions. It’s a non-obvious sign that speaks volumes about their character.

2) They show empathy

Empathy is a key trait of a good person. It’s the ability to put oneself in another’s shoes and understand their feelings.

I remember a situation with a friend of mine that left a lasting impression. We were in high school, and I was going through a really tough time. My parents were divorcing, I was struggling with my grades, and I felt like my world was falling apart.

Even though my friend had never been through something similar herself, she was always there for me. She listened to me, comforted me, and most importantly, she validated my feelings.

She didn’t try to fix things or offer unsolicited advice. She simply understood and empathized with how I felt.

That’s when I realized the power of empathy, and the significant role it plays in indicating someone’s goodness. It’s not always about having the same experiences, but about understanding and respecting the emotions of others.

3) They practice gratitude

Good people often have a habit of expressing gratitude. It’s not just about saying “thank you”, but about genuinely acknowledging and appreciating the good in their lives.

This doesn’t merely make them pleasant to be around; surprisingly, it also benefits their mental health. Studies have shown that practicing gratitude can lead to increased happiness, reduced depression, and improved sleep.

Gratitude is a powerful tool that good people often utilize, not for personal gain, but simply because they recognize the value and worth of others and the positive aspects of their lives. This recognition and appreciation is a non-obvious sign of a truly good person.

4) They’re not quick to judge

Good people understand that everyone has their own story, their own struggles, and their own journey. They know that surface appearances can be deceiving and that it’s unfair to judge someone without knowing their whole story.

They give people the benefit of the doubt, refraining from jumping to conclusions or making snap judgments. This patience and understanding allows them to form more meaningful and authentic connections with others.

Not being quick to judge shows a level of compassion and understanding that is a hallmark of truly good individuals. It’s a non-obvious sign, yet incredibly telling of someone’s character.

5) They’re kind to those who can’t offer them anything

There’s a saying that the true measure of a person is how they treat someone who can do them absolutely no good. This is a sentiment that rings true in the world of psychology.

Good people extend their kindness and generosity to everyone, not just those from whom they stand to gain. They’ll help a stranger on the street, volunteer their time for a cause that matters to them, or simply offer a comforting word to someone in need.

This selfless behavior stems from a place of empathy and compassion, not from the expectation of reciprocation or recognition.

It’s this genuine, unconditional kindness that sets truly good people apart. It’s a non-obvious sign, but one that speaks volumes about the depth of their goodness.

6) They admit when they’re wrong

Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes and have our flaws. But one of the signs of a truly good person is their ability to acknowledge when they’re wrong.

A few years ago, I made a major mistake at work that resulted in a significant loss for the company. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but instead of trying to shift the blame or make excuses, I admitted my error.

This wasn’t an easy thing to do. I had to face my colleagues and bosses, swallow my pride, and accept the consequences. But in doing so, I learned a valuable lesson about integrity and responsibility.

Good people understand that mistakes are a part of life. Instead of running from them, they own up to them, learn from them, and use them as stepping stones towards growth and improvement. This ability to admit when they’re wrong is a non-obvious sign of a genuinely good person.

7) They’re good listeners

Listening might seem like a passive activity, but it’s actually a powerful skill and a sign of a truly good person.

Good people don’t just hear the words you’re saying; they listen to understand. They give you their undivided attention, show empathy, and never rush to respond or interrupt. They value your thoughts and feelings and are genuinely interested in understanding your perspective.

Being a good listener is about more than just good manners or being polite. It’s a sign of respect, understanding, and empathy – key traits of a genuinely good person. It’s a non-obvious sign, but one that reveals a lot about someone’s character.

8) They make others feel good about themselves

The ultimate sign of a truly good person is their ability to make others feel good about themselves. They uplift those around them, not by offering false praise or flattery, but by recognizing and acknowledging their value and worth.

Good people understand that everyone has something unique and valuable to offer. They see the best in others, even when those individuals can’t see it in themselves. This ability to bring out the best in people is not just a sign of a good person; it’s the mark of a truly exceptional one.

What it all boils down to

When you strip away the layers, the essence of a truly good person is reflected not in grand gestures or public recognition, but in these subtle, non-obvious signs.

Psychology teaches us that goodness is embedded in traits like consistency, empathy, gratitude, patience – traits that often go unnoticed in the hustle and bustle of daily life.

Behavioral psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” This quote captures the essence of what it means to be a good person.

Being a good person is not an end goal but an ongoing journey – a journey marked by growth, understanding, and kindness towards oneself and others.

So as you navigate your own journey, keep these non-obvious signs in mind. They serve not just as indicators of goodness in others, but also as guideposts for cultivating our own inner goodness.

After all, recognizing and appreciating goodness in its various forms is perhaps the first step towards fostering it within ourselves.