9 things you should always keep private, according to psychology

There’s a fine line between being an open book and oversharing.

Psychology tells us that certain aspects of our lives are better kept to ourselves. Revealing too much can lead to judgments, misunderstandings, or even manipulation.

Staying private about certain things doesn’t mean you’re hiding or being dishonest. Instead, it’s about protecting your mental wellbeing and maintaining healthy boundaries.

In this article, I’ll share nine things that, according to psychology, are best kept private. This isn’t about secrecy, but about self-preservation and discretion.

Let’s dive right in.

1) Personal life details

It goes without saying that some aspects of our personal lives should remain private.

Psychology suggests that revealing too much about your personal life can make you vulnerable. It can lead to unsolicited advice, judgment, and even manipulation. After all, every individual has a unique perspective, and their advice or judgment may not suit your situation.

Sharing your personal life details might seem like a way to build connection and trust. But, it’s essential to remember that not everyone is worthy of this information.

It’s not about being secretive but maintaining a healthy boundary. You don’t have to share everything with everyone, and it’s perfectly okay.

Keep certain personal life details to yourself. It’s an effective way to safeguard your mental wellbeing and uphold your individuality.

2) Your future plans

We all have dreams and goals. They fuel our ambitions and inspire us to strive for a better life. But here’s a lesson I’ve learned, sometimes the hard way – not everyone needs to know your future plans.

I remember when I was planning a career shift. I shared my intentions with a friend, expecting support and encouragement. Instead, they questioned my decision, pointing out the risks and uncertainties. It left me feeling deflated and full of doubt.

Psychology suggests that sharing your future plans can sometimes backfire. It opens the door for others to project their fears and insecurities onto you. Their doubts can become your doubts, steering you away from your goals.

When you have a big plan or goal, consider keeping it to yourself. Nurture it privately, work towards it, and let the results speak for themselves.

3) Financial status

Money talks, but it doesn’t always need to be the topic of conversation. Discussing financial status can open a Pandora’s box of potential issues including envy, resentment or unnecessary judgment.

Psychology reveals that people’s perception of you can drastically change based on your financial status. It’s interesting to note that those perceived as wealthy are often seen as more competent, regardless of their actual skills or abilities. This stereotype can skew people’s judgment and lead to biased opinions.

Keeping your financial status private ensures you’re evaluated on your merits and not your monetary worth. It also protects you from potential ill-intended individuals looking to take advantage of your financial situation.

4) Family issues

Family matters are often complex and deeply personal. Sharing these issues openly can sometimes lead to unwarranted advice, misunderstanding, or judgment.

Psychology tells us that we all come from different family dynamics and backgrounds. What might seem normal in one household could be considered strange or inappropriate in another.

Furthermore, disclosing family issues can sometimes lead to damaging rumors or gossip, which could potentially escalate the problem.

Therefore, keeping family issues private not only protects your family’s reputation but also maintains respect and trust within your familial relationships. It’s crucial to seek advice when needed, but ensure it’s from a trusted source who understands your family dynamics.

5) Personal beliefs

We all have our own personal beliefs, whether they’re about politics, religion, or social issues. These beliefs shape who we are and how we view the world.

However, openly sharing these beliefs can sometimes lead to heated debates or conflicts, especially in a society that’s increasingly polarized. People have diverse views, and what you believe in might not align with the beliefs of others.

Psychology proposes that sharing your personal beliefs can sometimes create a barrier between you and the other person. It can lead to judgment, bias, and even impact your relationships.

It’s wise to keep your personal beliefs to yourself unless you’re in a safe and open-minded space where differing viewpoints are respected and valued.

6) Acts of kindness

Have you ever done something kind for someone else, not for recognition, but simply because it was the right thing to do? These selfless acts are what make us human and add joy to our lives.

Psychology suggests that the real value of kindness lies in its sincerity. When we share our good deeds, it can sometimes take away from the purity of the act. It can lead to questions about whether we did it for the joy of giving or for the praise and recognition.

Keeping acts of kindness private not only preserves their authenticity but also creates a personal sense of fulfillment. It’s a beautiful secret between you and the person you’ve helped, a memory that you both can cherish forever.

When you help someone, consider keeping it to yourself. The joy and satisfaction from helping others is far greater than any recognition or praise.

7) Your fears and insecurities

I remember a time when I was terrified of public speaking. My heart would race, my hands would shake, and the mere thought of standing in front of a crowd would send me into a panic. I shared this fear with a colleague, hoping for understanding. Instead, I was met with surprise and even a hint of mockery.

Fears and insecurities are part of being human. We all have them. But psychology suggests that exposing these vulnerabilities can sometimes lead to unsolicited advice or judgment.

Sharing your fears can make you an easy target for manipulation. People can use this information against you or exploit your weaknesses.

It’s wise to keep your fears and insecurities to yourself unless you’re sharing them with someone you deeply trust. In the right hands, these vulnerabilities can be met with empathy and understanding, helping us grow and overcome our fears.

8) Personal achievements

We all love the feeling of accomplishment when we achieve something significant. It’s only natural to want to share our victories with those around us.

However, psychology suggests that constantly sharing your successes can lead to envy or resentment from others. People might feel inadequate in comparison or question their own achievements.

Keeping your accomplishments to yourself doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate your success. It just means you’re doing so humbly and quietly. It allows you to enjoy your triumphs without making others feel less successful.

While it’s great to share good news, consider keeping some of your personal achievements private. It can contribute to maintaining a harmonious relationship with those around you.

9) Your deepest secrets

Every one of us has secrets; the kind that’s deeply personal and known only to us. These secrets are part of who we are and what makes us unique.

Psychology highlights the importance of maintaining these secrets as a form of self-preservation. Sharing them can lead to vulnerability, judgment, or even betrayal.

Your deepest secrets are your own. They belong to you and only you. Revealing them should be a choice made with utmost care and consideration.

Keep your deepest secrets safeguarded. It’s a way to protect your emotional wellbeing and preserve your individuality.

Final note: It’s about self-preservation

The essence of maintaining certain aspects of our lives private is deeply rooted in psychology.

It’s not about fostering secrecy but rather about preserving our mental health, maintaining healthy relationships, and upholding our dignity.

Remember, you are the guardian of your personal information. You have the power to choose what to share and what to keep private. This is not about creating barriers, but about protecting your emotional wellbeing and personal integrity.

The importance of privacy cannot be overstated. In the words of renowned psychoanalyst, Sigmund Freud, “The first requisite of civilization is that of justice, which is the minimum amount of love required by human beings from one another.”

So as you navigate through life, keep in mind that some things are best kept private. It’s a fundamental aspect of building trust, respect, and a sense of security in your day-to-day interactions.

Reflect on this as you continue on your journey. After all, privacy isn’t just a right; it’s a necessary element for mental wellness and personal growth.