7 Bible passages to remember during conflict with a loved one

We’ve all been there.

A disagreement with a loved one spirals out of control, and suddenly you’re in the midst of a full-blown conflict. The hurtful words fly, tempers rise, and before you know it, you’re left feeling frustrated, misunderstood, and alone.

Conflicts with loved ones can shake our world, leaving us feeling lost and frustrated. It’s not always easy to find the right words or actions to heal the rifts that disagreements can create.

When words fail us, and emotions run high, turning to time-tested wisdom can offer solace and guidance. That’s where the Bible comes into play, serving as a source of comfort and insight during our most challenging moments.

Here, we’ll explore seven Bible passages that are perfect for navigating conflicts with those we care about. These verses can help pave the way to understanding, forgiveness, and a stronger bond moving forward.

Let’s dive in and find some clarity in these timeless words.

1) Proverbs 15:1

Words wield an immense power. They can either build bridges or burn them down. But here’s something you might not have considered – the tone of your words matters just as much.

Here’s what Proverbs 15:1 says: “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

This verse is a powerful reminder that responding to conflict with gentleness and patience can often de-escalate the situation. Instead of lashing back with harsh words when you’re hurt or misunderstood, consider responding with a calm and gentle spirit.

But let’s be honest.

It’s easier said than done, especially when emotions are running high. But remember, the goal is to bridge the gap, not widen it. So, the next time conflict arises, take a deep breath, and let your words be gentle and full of grace. It might just turn the tide in your favor.

2) James 1:19

Not too long ago, I found myself embroiled in a conflict with a dear friend. It was one of those disagreements that began as a small misunderstanding but quickly escalated into a heated argument.

Then I remembered James 1:19, which advises us, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”

It struck me that I had been so engrossed in getting my point across that I had forgotten to actually listen to what my friend was saying. I realized I was more focused on defending myself than trying to understand her perspective.

So, I decided to take a step back.

I allowed her to express her feelings without interruption. It wasn’t easy, especially when I felt she was wrong. But once she had expressed herself, I could see the situation from her point of view. It led us to a place of understanding and ultimately, reconciliation.

And that’s the beauty of this verse.

It reminds us that sometimes, the best thing we can do in a conflict is to slow down and really listen. Listening goes beyond just hearing words – it’s about understanding the heart behind them. And when we do that, we open the doors for empathy, understanding, and eventually, resolution.

3) Matthew 18:15-16

Matthew 18:15-16 lays it out plainly:

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'”

This passage is all about the value of hashing things out one-on-one first. It’s like saying, “Hey, let’s keep this just between us to see if we can sort it out.”

This approach keeps things low-key and can stop the situation from blowing up into something bigger. It’s about giving each other a fair shot to fix things without making a big scene.

And if that doesn’t work, then it’s time to bring in a couple of trusted folks to help out. It’s a smart way to handle it, making sure everyone feels heard and keeping things as calm as possible.

4) Ephesians 4:26-27

Do you ever go to bed angry?

I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve done it more times than I’d like to count. After a heated argument, it’s sometimes easier to just turn off the lights and call it a day, hoping things will be better in the morning.

But here’s a wake-up call.

Ephesians 4:26-27 tells us, “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”

This verse has been a game-changer for me.

It isn’t saying that anger is sinful. Anger is a natural human emotion. But what it does caution us against is letting anger fester. Because when we do, it opens up space for negativity, bitterness, and resentment to take hold.

So here’s the challenge.

The next time you find yourself in conflict with a loved one, make it a point to resolve it before you hit the pillow. It might require some tough conversations and swallowing of pride, but believe me, the peace that comes from resolution is worth it.

Plus, you’ll sleep better too!

5) Romans 12:18

Romans 12:18 delivers a powerful message, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

Take note of the wording in this verse – “as far as it depends on you”. This implies that maintaining peace isn’t solely your responsibility. It’s a two-way street.

So what does this mean for us?

It means that while we should strive for peace in our relationships, we also need to recognize that we can’t control how others respond. We can only control our actions and reactions.

And if despite our best efforts, peace seems elusive, remember that it doesn’t necessarily reflect on you.

Sometimes, conflict is an opportunity for growth and learning. Embrace it, learn from it, and let it guide you towards becoming a better version of yourself.

6) Colossians 3:13

Another one that’s close to my heart is this verse from the Book of Colossians: 

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

The essence of this verse is forgiveness. And I won’t sugarcoat it – forgiveness is hard. It’s especially difficult when the hurt runs deep or when the person who hurt you doesn’t seem to realize the extent of their actions.

But here’s a gentle reminder.

We all make mistakes. We all say things we don’t mean, and we all hurt people, often unintentionally. But just as we crave forgiveness when we mess up, we should also be willing to extend that same grace to others.

So take a moment.

Take a moment to let go of the resentment you’re holding onto. To forgive not just for their sake, but for your own peace. It’s not about forgetting what happened or pretending it didn’t hurt. It’s about allowing yourself to heal and move forward.

7) 1 Peter 4:8

” Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”

This verse from 1 Peter 4:8 is perhaps the most crucial piece of advice when dealing with conflict.

Love.

It’s not just a feeling or an emotion. It’s an action, a choice. It’s choosing to be patient when patience is hard to come by. It’s choosing to be kind when kindness seems impossible. It’s choosing to forgive when forgiveness seems out of reach.

Because love, in its essence, is selfless. It seeks the good of the other, even when the other has caused hurt or pain.

So let your actions be guided by love. Let it be the lens through which you view conflict, and the tool with which you seek resolution. Because at the end of the day, love truly does cover over a multitude of sins.

Final reflections

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve been in a conflict with a loved one. And it’s likely you’ve been searching for ways to navigate these turbulent waters with grace and understanding.

Well, here’s the comforting news – you’re not alone.

We all face conflicts. They are part and parcel of life. And it’s important to remember that it’s how we handle them that truly matters.

These seven Bible passages offer guidance in times of conflict. They are wise words to hold on to when you feel like it’s just impossible to speak gently. 

Consider these verses as a roadmap for navigating relational conflicts. Reflect on them. Pray over them. Let them guide your actions and reactions during those challenging moments.

And most importantly, remember that you’re not walking this road alone. You’ve got a loving God who’s ready to guide you each step of the way.