9 easy-to-miss tactics spiritual gaslighters use to manipulate you

As a Christian, your faith is a deeply personal and sacred part of your life.

But what happens when someone uses that very faith to control, confuse, or belittle you?

Spiritual gaslighting is a subtle yet insidious form of manipulation that distorts your beliefs and undermines your spiritual well-being.

It can be difficult to recognize, especially when the person doing it presents themselves as a trusted guide or fellow believer.

If you’ve ever felt guilty, confused, or uncertain about your own faith after interacting with someone, you might be dealing with a spiritual gaslighter.

In this article, we’ll reveal nine easy-to-miss tactics that spiritual gaslighters use to manipulate you, helping you protect your faith and reclaim your spiritual autonomy.

1) They play on your fears

As humans, we’re hardwired to avoid discomfort. It’s a survival instinct. And spiritual gaslighters know how to exploit that.

They’ll tap into your fears, insecurities, and anxieties. They’ll make you believe that you’re constantly under some kind of spiritual threat or danger.

Maybe they’ll tell you that you’re spiritually weak or vulnerable. Maybe they’ll convince you that you’re being attacked by some unseen force or entity.

And then, they’ll position themselves as your only line of defense. They’ll make you believe that only they can protect you, guide you, and keep you safe.

But remember, it’s all a manipulation tactic. It’s a way to keep you under their control, to keep you dependent on them.

2) They use the “only path” argument

I’ve experienced this one personally, and it’s an incredibly effective manipulation trick.

In my case, my spiritual mentor would emphasize that her teachings were the “only path” to enlightenment. She’d say that all other spiritual practices were misguided or even dangerous.

This created a sense of exclusivity and urgency. I felt like I needed to follow her teachings closely, or I’d miss out on this unique path to spiritual growth.

But over time, I realized it was a control tactic. By making me believe that her way was the only way, she was ensuring that I wouldn’t seek guidance or insight from anyone else.

It took me a while to see it, but once I did, I was able to break away and explore a more diverse range of spiritual practices.

And you know what? My spiritual journey has been richer and more fulfilling because of it.

3) They twist your words

Spiritual gaslighters are master manipulators, and one of their favorite tactics is to distort the truth. They’ll take your words, spin them around, and use them against you.

For instance, you may share your feelings about a certain issue and instead of respecting your perspective, they’ll reinterpret your words to fit their narrative.

This is a classic technique used in gaslighting known as “countering“. The goal is to make you question your memory, perception, and sanity. Research has found that this form of manipulation can lead to severe psychological distress over time.

So if you ever feel like your words are being twisted or used against you, take a moment to reflect. Trust your instincts and remember that it’s okay to stand by your truth.

4) They use guilt to control you

Guilt is a powerful emotion, and spiritual gaslighters know exactly how to leverage it.

They’ll make you feel guilty for questioning them, for expressing your feelings, or for not living up to their unrealistic expectations.

You might hear phrases like “If you really cared about your spiritual growth, you would…” or “How can you call yourself a believer if you…”. They use guilt as a tool to make you comply with their demands.

Remember, no one has the right to make you feel guilty for prioritizing your well-being or for standing up for yourself.

It’s okay to question, it’s okay to feel, and it’s okay to establish boundaries. Don’t let anyone manipulate your emotions for their own benefit.

5) They isolate you from others

A common tactic spiritual gaslighters use is to isolate you from your support system. They’ll make you feel like you can’t trust your friends, family, or anyone outside of their influence.

They might convince you that these people don’t understand you or your spiritual journey. Or they might paint them as threats to your spiritual growth.

The goal is to sever your connections with others so that they can have more control over you.

If you start to notice that someone is trying to cut you off from the people who care about you, take a step back. This is a red flag that they might be trying to manipulate you.

A true spiritual guide will want to see you thrive in all areas of your life, including your relationships with others.

6) They impose a fear of consequences

One of the most heartbreaking things I’ve seen in spiritual gaslighting is the imposition of a fear of consequences.

Spiritual gaslighters will often paint a terrifying picture of what will happen if you don’t follow their guidance. They might talk about severe spiritual repercussions, or even physical or emotional harm.

It’s a cruel tactic, designed to keep you in line out of pure fear. It’s manipulative and destructive, and it has no place in a genuine spiritual journey.

Your spiritual path should be one of love, growth, and understanding – not fear. If someone is trying to scare you into submission, remember that this is not true spirituality.

7) They discredit your experiences

I’ll never forget the time when I first started to question the teachings of my spiritual leader.

I was expressing my doubts, sharing my feelings, and instead of listening, they dismissed my experiences.

They told me I was just confused, that I didn’t understand the spiritual truths they were teaching. They made me feel like my thoughts and feelings were invalid.

But here’s what I’ve learned: Your experiences are yours and yours alone. They are valid, they are real, and they matter. No one has the right to discredit or dismiss them.

So if someone tries to belittle your experiences or make you feel small, remember that it’s a manipulation tactic. You have every right to question, to doubt, and to seek your own truth.

8) They withhold information

Knowledge is power, and spiritual gaslighters know it. They’ll often withhold crucial information from you to keep you reliant on them.

They might not fully explain certain teachings or practices, leaving you confused and unsure. They might also hide certain aspects of their belief system until they feel you’re ‘ready’.

This tactic is designed to keep you in a state of dependency. You’re always left wanting more, always seeking their guidance.

A true spiritual guide, on the other hand, will be transparent and open, not secretive and withholding.

9) They make you doubt your intuition

The most dangerous thing a spiritual gaslighter can do is make you doubt your own intuition.

They’ll question your thoughts, your feelings, and your experiences until you start to question them too.

But here’s the truth: Your intuition is one of the most powerful spiritual tools you have. It’s your inner compass, your guide, and it should be trusted.

Trust in yourself, trust in your inner voice, and never let anyone take that away from you.

Remember: It’s about your empowerment

Spiritual gaslighting is a harmful form of manipulation that can shake your faith and leave you questioning your beliefs.

Recognizing these nine tactics is the first step toward protecting yourself from those who seek to control you under the guise of spirituality.

By staying grounded in your own relationship with God and seeking guidance from trusted sources, you can resist manipulation and maintain the integrity of your faith

Stay vigilant, trust in your discernment, and continue to nurture a faith that is truly your own.