If someone displays these 10 behaviors, they’re exhausting to be around

Let’s face it, we all know someone who just drains our energy. They’re not necessarily bad people, but their behavior can leave us feeling exhausted.

The crux of the matter? Certain behaviors are just plain taxing. And smart folks know how to spot them early.

In this article, we’ll delve into the 10 behaviors that are often displayed by people who are exhausting to be around. We’ll not only identify these behaviors, but also explore why they’re so draining.

1) Constant complaining

We’ve all come across this type of person. You know, the one who never seems to have a good day.

Their glass isn’t just half empty, it’s shattered on the floor. And they’re more than keen on telling you about it, in painstaking detail.

Consistent negativity can be a real drain on your energy. It’s like they’re siphoning off your positivity to fuel their own cloud of gloom.

Now, it’s important to differentiate between those going through a tough time and chronic complainers. We all have bad days, weeks, heck even years. Being there for a friend in need is part of being a good companion.

But when someone’s default setting is to moan and groan about everything and everyone? That’s when they become exhausting to be around.

2) One-upmanship

Ever have a conversation with someone, and no matter what you say, they’ve always done something bigger, better or more exciting? Yeah, I’ve been there too.

I remember once I was sharing a story about a hiking trip I took to the Smoky Mountains. The views were stunning, the air was fresh, it was a fantastic experience. But before I could even finish, my friend (let’s call him Mark) had to jump in with his own mountain climbing story.

Apparently, he had scaled Mount Kilimanjaro barefoot while fending off snow leopards or something. Okay, maybe not exactly that, but you get the picture.

Having a one-upper in your life can be exhausting. You feel like you’re constantly in competition, that your experiences and achievements are constantly being overshadowed. It’s tiring and honestly, it can take the joy out of sharing your own experiences.

3) Non-stop talking

We all know someone who loves the sound of their own voice a little too much. They dominate every conversation, often cutting others off or not giving them a chance to speak.

Here’s something you may not know: according to research, people who talk non-stop are often anxious or insecure. They talk to fill the silence because it makes them uncomfortable.

But while it may be a coping mechanism for them, it can be exhausting for those on the receiving end. Conversations are meant to be a two-way street, after all.

So, if you find yourself worn out after a conversation with someone who doesn’t know when to pause, don’t blame yourself. Their incessant chatter isn’t just tiring – it’s an energy zapper.

4) Lack of personal boundaries

Personal space, privacy, time – these are all things we value. But some people just don’t seem to get the memo.

They’re the ones who are always in your space, demanding your time, or oversharing about their personal lives. They don’t seem to understand the concept of boundaries.

And it’s not just about physical space. They may constantly call or message you, disregard your schedule, or fail to respect your personal needs and feelings.

Having someone disregard your boundaries can be incredibly draining. It feels like you’re constantly on the defensive, trying to protect your space and peace of mind.

So if someone’s always overstepping your boundaries, know that it’s okay to feel exhausted. Their lack of respect for your personal space is not just tiring – it’s downright disrespectful.

5) Chronic lateness

We’ve all been late at some point – it’s part of being human. But then there are those who seem to have made a sport out of it.

You know who I’m talking about. The ones who consistently show up late to meetings, dinners, or events, often with a plethora of excuses in tow.

This chronic tardiness can be incredibly draining for those waiting on them. It’s a clear lack of respect for others’ time and can leave you feeling frustrated and undervalued.

6) Emotional vampirism

Emotional vampires are those who suck the positivity right out of you. They’re often needy, manipulative, or overly dramatic, leaving you feeling drained after every interaction.

These individuals have a knack for turning every conversation into a therapy session, often dumping their emotional baggage onto others without considering the impact.

Dealing with an emotional vampire can feel like you’re carrying the weight of their world on your shoulders. It’s exhausting, overwhelming and can leave you feeling emotionally depleted.

Remember, it’s not your responsibility to fix everyone else’s problems. And if someone is consistently using you as their emotional dumping ground, it’s okay to feel drained. Their emotional vampirism isn’t just tiring, it’s an unfair burden on your own mental health.

7) Constant criticism

Nobody’s perfect, and we all have room to grow and improve. But there’s a huge difference between constructive criticism and a constant barrage of negativity.

I once had a friend who could find a flaw in literally everything. From my choice of outfit to my career decisions, nothing was safe from her criticism. It felt like I was constantly under scrutiny, and it was incredibly draining.

Criticism, when not offered in a helpful or kindly manner, can be very damaging. It can sap your confidence and leave you feeling perpetually inadequate.

So, if someone continually criticizes you without providing any constructive feedback, know that it’s not about you. It’s about them. And such behavior is not just hurtful, but it can also be incredibly exhausting to be around.

8) Overly positive

Sounds strange, right? How can someone being positive be exhausting? But bear with me here.

We all know that person who always seems to see the world through rose-tinted glasses. They’re constantly cheerful, always optimistic, and never seem to have a bad day.

While positivity is generally a good thing, an excess of it can sometimes feel inauthentic or even dismissive. It’s like they’re living in a bubble, ignoring the harsh realities of life.

When you’re going through a tough time, the last thing you want is someone dismissing your feelings with a “cheer up” or a “look on the bright side.”

9) Gossiping

Gossiping can seem like harmless fun at first, but it can quickly become draining. We all know someone who thrives on the latest rumors, always eager to share the juiciest tidbits about others.

However, being around a constant gossiper can be exhausting. It fosters a negative environment, one filled with judgment and insecurity. You might start to wonder, “If they’re talking about others this way, what are they saying about me when I’m not around?”

Not to mention, it’s a waste of your precious time and energy. Instead of focusing on growth and positivity, you’re stuck in a cycle of hearsay and negativity.

So if you find yourself feeling drained by someone’s incessant gossiping, know that it’s perfectly normal. Gossip is not just trivial chatter – it’s a toxic behavior that can take a toll on your emotional wellbeing.

10) Lack of empathy

At the heart of all draining behaviors, there’s often a lack of empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what allows us to form deep, meaningful connections with people.

But when someone lacks empathy, it can feel like you’re talking to a brick wall. They dismiss your feelings, ignore your needs, or belittle your experiences. This kind of behavior can leave you feeling unheard and invalidated.

So if you’re around someone who lacks empathy, it’s understandable that you might feel drained. Their inability to connect on a deeper emotional level isn’t just isolating – it’s emotionally exhausting.

Final thoughts: Personal energy is invaluable

Our emotional and mental well-being plays a significant role in our overall quality of life. It impacts our relationships, our work, and most importantly, our relationship with ourselves.

Being around people who drain us can have a negative effect on our well-being. It’s important to remember that it’s okay to distance ourselves from such individuals. After all, we all have the right to protect our emotional space.

The behaviors we’ve discussed may be difficult to navigate, but being aware of them is the first step towards managing their impact. The next step? Taking action that prioritizes your emotional health and well-being.

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Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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