If you’re looking to be someone people trust, there are a few habits you might want to kick to the curb.
Trust is the glue in any relationship, whether it’s with friends, family, or colleagues, but certain behaviors can chip away at it without you even realizing.
In this article, we’re going to pinpoint seven subtle behaviors that could be undermining people’s trust in you, from the little white lies we think are harmless to neglecting the power of a good listen.
Let’s dive into what these habits are and how you can say goodbye to them, so you can build stronger, more trusting relationships with those around you.
Whether you’re often overpromising, playing the blame game, or just not being consistent, recognizing these actions is the first step to changing them.
Ready to become a more trustworthy person?
Let’s get started.
1) Beware of white lies
We’ve all done it.
Told a little white lie, here and there.
Maybe to avoid conflict, to save someone’s feelings, or just to make our own lives a little easier.
But here’s the truth.
Even the smallest of lies can cause big damage.
When it comes to trust, honesty is non-negotiable.
People value authenticity and transparency above everything else.
So the next time you’re tempted to tell a white lie, stop.
Honesty, no matter how uncomfortable, is always the best policy.
2) Overpromising and under-delivering
I remember a time when I promised a colleague that I’d help him with a project over the weekend.
I had the best intentions, but come Saturday, I was swamped with personal stuff and couldn’t help as much as I’d committed.
You can imagine the fallout.
He was left in a lurch, and though I apologized profusely, it took quite some time to regain his trust.
A hard lesson learned.
Overpromising and under-delivering is one of those subtle behaviors that can slowly erode trust.
It’s always better to under-promise and over-deliver.
Make a habit of being realistic about what you can do and when you can do it.
It’s not about being negative or pessimistic, it’s about managing expectations.
And trust me, people appreciate that kind of honesty.
It shows them they can count on you to deliver on your word.
3) Playing the blame game
Have you ever found yourself pointing the finger at someone else when things go wrong?
It’s an easy way out, isn’t it?
But let me tell you something.
People don’t trust those who aren’t able to take responsibility for their mistakes.
It’s a hard pill to swallow, I know.
But in the grand scheme of things, owning up to your errors shows strength, courage, and a willingness to learn and grow.
To build trust, we need to drop this habit of playing the blame game.
Instead, embrace your failures. Learn from them.
Let them be your stepping stones towards becoming a better person.
Ultimately, every mistake is a lesson in disguise.
The more open you are about your flaws and failures, the more people will trust you.
After all, we’re all human and none of us are perfect.
Embrace that, and others will too.
4) Being inconsistent
Consistency is the key to trust.
Think about it.
You trust that the sun will rise every morning, don’t you?
That’s because it has consistently done so every day of your life.
It’s dependable, reliable, consistent.
The same principle applies to human relationships.
Inconsistency in behavior, promises, or actions can make people question your reliability.
If one day you’re all in, and the next you’re nowhere to be found, it creates confusion and doubt.
So if you want to build trust, strive for consistency in all that you do.
Be the person others can count on to show up, to follow through, and to be there when it matters most.
5) Keeping secrets
Did you know that the human brain has a natural tendency to fill in the gaps?
When we don’t have the full story, our minds start speculating and often assume the worst.
That’s why keeping secrets can be so detrimental to trust.
When people suspect you’re hiding something, it creates a barrier.
They start feeling left out, or worse, deceived.
Everyone appreciates transparency, especially when it comes to building trust.
So if you want people to trust you, make sure you’re transparent with them.
Share what needs to be shared in a timely and respectful manner.
6) Neglecting other people’s feelings
We all have our own battles, our own struggles, and our own victories.
But in the hustle and bustle of life, it’s easy to forget that others have their own stories too.
When we neglect to consider the feelings of others, it can build a wall of misunderstanding and mistrust.
It’s like trying to navigate through a storm without a compass.
You’re bound to get lost.
Instead, try putting yourself in their shoes.
Understand their perspective, their emotions and show them that you care.
In my experience, empathy is one of the most powerful tools for building trust.
It shows people that you’re not just concerned about yourself, but you genuinely care about them too.
Let’s make an effort to understand and respect the feelings of others.
This simple act can go a long way in earning the trust of those around you.
7) Ignoring the power of listening
Listening is a lot more than just hearing words.
It’s about understanding, empathizing, and showing genuine interest in what the other person is saying.
In a world full of people who love to talk, being a good listener can set you apart.
It shows people that their thoughts, feelings, and words matter to you.
Listening builds trust because it breaks down walls, opens up communication channels, and creates a safe space for honest conversation.
So, if you want to be trusted, learn to listen.
Not just to respond or advise, but to understand and connect.
If you see yourself in these behaviors, don’t worry.
We’re all works in progress, and recognizing these habits is the first step towards change.
Remember, trust isn’t built overnight.
It’s the sum of countless small moments where you choose honesty over deception, empathy over indifference, and consistency over unpredictability.
Each time you make these choices, you’re laying another brick in the foundation of trust.
Start by observing your actions.
Notice the times when you’re tempted to tell a white lie, or when you’re quick to blame others.
Pay attention to your consistency and how it impacts those around you.
Once you’re aware of these subtleties, it becomes easier to change them.
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