If you want to be respected by your friends and family as you get older, say goodbye to these 8 behaviors

Growing older is a tricky business, isn’t it?

We all want to age gracefully, to be loved and respected by those around us.

But sometimes, the way we act can hold us back.

It’s not about pretending to be someone else or trying to please everyone.

It’s about realizing that certain behaviors can create a wall between us and the people we care about.

You might not even notice you’re doing them.

Or maybe you do, but you’ve convinced yourself they’re just part of who you are.

Let’s face it – change is hard. But it’s also necessary, especially if we want to maintain healthy and respectful relationships as we grow older.

Here’s a list of 8 behaviors that might be standing in your way. Saying goodbye to these could just be the key to gaining the respect and admiration you deserve.

1) Letting ego overshadow empathy

There’s no denying it, we all have an ego. It’s part of what makes us human.

But here’s the thing – if we let it take center stage, it can seriously damage our relationships.

Ego can make us stubborn, unyielding, and sometimes even blind to the feelings of others. It can make us believe we’re always right and everyone else is wrong.

Imagine trying to have a meaningful conversation with someone who simply won’t listen because their ego is in the way. Not fun, right?

As we age, empathy becomes more important than ever. It’s about understanding and sharing the feelings of others.

This doesn’t mean you always have to agree with them, but simply acknowledging their perspective can work wonders.

So keep that ego in check. Listen more, talk less, and always try to see things from the other person’s point of view. 

2) Holding onto grudges

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? Someone hurts us and it feels impossible to let go of that pain.

I remember a time when a close friend betrayed my trust. It felt like a punch to the gut. I was angry, hurt, and all I wanted was an apology. But it never came.

For years, I held onto that grudge. Every time I saw her, every time her name came up in conversation, that bitterness would bubble to the surface. And it didn’t just affect my relationship with her, it affected how I interacted with everyone else too.

One day, I realized something – that grudge was doing more harm to me than it was to her. It was like a poison, seeping into every part of my life.

So I made the decision to let it go. Not for her, but for me. And you know what? It was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Holding onto grudges as we age only isolates us from our loved ones. It’s a behavior that can be incredibly damaging, not just to our relationships but also to our own mental health.

Letting go of grudges doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning what happened. It simply means choosing your own peace over lingering resentment.

3) Being resistant to change

Change is a natural part of life. It’s inevitable and constant. Yet, many of us are resistant to it.

As the great Charles Darwin once said, “It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent; it is the one most adaptable to change.”

There’s a lot of wisdom in those words, especially when it comes to our relationships as we age.

Think about it – how can we expect to grow and evolve if we’re constantly fighting against change? How can we hope to maintain healthy relationships if we’re unwilling to adapt and adjust?

Becoming more open to change doesn’t mean you have to compromise your values or beliefs. It simply means being flexible and understanding that different situations may require different approaches.

It’s about recognizing that change is an opportunity for growth. And who wouldn’t want that? After all, growth equals progress, and progress is a surefire way to earn respect from your friends and family as you get older.

4) Clinging to the need to be right

Have you ever been in an argument where you were so focused on proving your point that you didn’t even listen to the other person’s perspective? We’ve all been there. And while it might feel good in the moment, in the long run, it’s not going to win you any points with your friends and family.

Research shows that people who are willing to admit when they’re wrong are perceived as more likable and trustworthy. It’s a simple behavior change that can have a big impact on how people see us.

Admitting you’re wrong doesn’t mean you’re weak or unintelligent. On the contrary, it shows that you value truth over your own ego. It shows that you’re willing to learn and grow.

As we get older, this becomes even more important. Our friends and family want to know that we can be humble, that we can admit our mistakes and learn from them.

The next time you find yourself in a disagreement, instead of digging your heels in, take a step back. Listen to what the other person is saying. You might just learn something new.

5) Ignoring the importance of communication

Let’s face it – communication is the backbone of any relationship.

Without it, misunderstandings crop up, feelings get hurt, and before you know it, a small issue can turn into a major rift.

As we age, our communication skills need to evolve too. Gone are the days when we could simply brush things under the carpet or ignore them in the hopes that they’ll go away.

People appreciate transparency. They want to know what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling. They want to be able to trust that you can express yourself honestly and respectfully.

Maybe it’s about having a difficult conversation with a family member, or expressing your feelings to a friend. Maybe it’s about learning to listen as much as you speak.

Whatever it is, improving your communication skills is a surefire way to gain respect from your friends and family as you age. It shows them that you value their thoughts and feelings as much as your own.

6) Neglecting self-care

This might seem like it’s all about you, but it has a bigger impact on your relationships than you might think.

Self-care is not selfish, it’s necessary. When we neglect our own needs, it not only affects our physical and mental health, but it also affects how we interact with others.

If we’re constantly stressed out, tired, or feeling unwell, it’s going to show in our relationships.

We may become irritable, less patient, even withdrawn. And that’s not fair to the people who care about us.

As we age, taking care of ourselves becomes even more crucial. It’s about setting boundaries, taking time for activities we enjoy, and paying attention to our physical health.

When we take care of ourselves, we’re better equipped to take care of our relationships. We’re more patient, more understanding, and more pleasant to be around.

7) Overstepping boundaries

Boundaries are crucial in any relationship. They help define what is acceptable and what is not. Yet, often, we tend to overstep these boundaries, perhaps without even realizing it.

It could be something as simple as offering unsolicited advice or pushing someone to share more than they’re comfortable with. It might not seem like a big deal, but over time, these little transgressions can erode trust and respect.

As we get older, respecting boundaries becomes even more important. It’s about understanding that everyone has a right to their own space and privacy. It’s about learning to respect that space and not pushing others to conform to our expectations or desires.

Remember, respect is earned, not given. And one of the best ways to earn it is by respecting the boundaries of others.

So take a step back and think about the boundaries in your relationships. Are you respecting them? If not, it might be time for a change. Because when it comes to earning respect, it’s often the little things that make the biggest difference.

8) Failing to show gratitude

When was the last time you said “thank you”? Seems small, doesn’t it?

But here’s the thing – gratitude is one of the most powerful ways to foster respect in your relationships.

It’s not just about expressing thanks for big gestures or gifts. It’s about appreciating the small, everyday things that often go unnoticed. It’s about recognizing the effort and care that others put into their relationships with you.

As we get older, this becomes more important than ever. Our friends and family want to know that we appreciate them, that we don’t take them for granted.

Failing to show gratitude can come across as entitlement or indifference – two traits that don’t exactly scream “respect me”.

Make it a habit to express gratitude regularly. A simple “thank you”, a heartfelt note, a small gesture of appreciation – they can all make a world of difference.

After all, respect is a two-way street. If you want to be respected, you need to show respect too. And there’s no better way to do that than by expressing your gratitude for the people in your life.

Final thoughts

As we journey through life, it’s clear that gaining respect, especially from those we care about, is not about grand gestures or titles. It lies in the small, everyday behaviors and actions that define us.

Over time, we may have developed habits that, unbeknownst to us, may be hindering the respect we seek. But it’s never too late to change. The key is self-awareness and a willingness to adapt.

Start by reflecting on your own behaviors. Do any of these signs resonate with you? If so, take a deep breath and understand this is a part of growth. It’s about recognizing these behaviors and making conscious decisions to change them.

Change is gradual, and it requires patience and perseverance. Celebrate every step forward, no matter how small it may seem. With each conscious decision to let go of these behaviors, you’re not only gaining respect from others but also fostering self-respect.

As Nelson Mandela once said, “Respect is the esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person.” Remember, respect starts with self. So nurture that sense of self-worth and watch as your relationships bloom with mutual respect and admiration.

It’s a journey worth taking, not just for others but for your own fulfillment as well.