Men who prioritize looks in a partner above all else usually display these 8 behaviors, says psychology

When it comes to relationships, what drives attraction?

While everyone has their preferences, men who place an overwhelming emphasis on physical appearance in a partner tend to exhibit specific behaviors that reveal much about their priorities and emotional tendencies.

If you’ve been in a relationship with a man who values physical attractiveness above all else, you might have noticed some recurring behaviors.

Maybe they’re constantly commenting on your appearance, or perhaps they seem overly fixated on the physical attractiveness of others. 

Psychology suggest that these men often demonstrate patterns like superficiality in communication or placing less value on deeper emotional connections.

So what exactly are these 8 behaviors, and why do they matter?

Understanding them can offer critical insights into the dynamics of such relationships and the potential challenges they face.

1) They frequently comment on physical appearance

Men who prioritize looks in a partner often have a habit of commenting on physical appearance – and not just yours.

They may frequently remark upon the looks of others, whether it’s a passing stranger or a celebrity on TV.

These comments, while they might seem harmless at first, can become a cause for concern.

Why? Because they reflect a deep-seated fixation on physical attractiveness, which might overshadow other important aspects of a relationship such as compatibility, emotional connection or shared values.

Ofcourse appreciation of beauty is natural. But when it becomes the primary focus, it can lead to unrealistic expectations and pressures.

It might make you feel like you’re constantly under scrutiny, which is not conducive to a healthy relationship.

2) They show little interest in personal growth

Interestingly, men who place a high emphasis on physical attractiveness often display a lack of interest in personal growth and development.

You might expect them to be equally concerned about self-improvement, considering their focus on appearance. However, this isn’t generally the case.

They may seem uninterested in intellectual conversations or activities that foster personal or emotional growth. They might prefer discussing or engaging in topics that are surface-level or appearance-focused.

It’s not about intelligence or capability, but rather where their priorities lie.

3) Their relationships often lack depth

When a man values looks above all else in a partner, his relationships may often lack depth. This isn’t a mere assumption but a pattern observed in many such scenarios.

These men might have a string of relationships that seem to start off strong and passionate, but they tend to fizzle out quickly.

The reason? It’s hard to maintain a relationship when it’s built largely on physical attraction, because beauty fades with time and doesn’t provide the emotional and intellectual satisfaction that most people seek in a long-term relationship.

Relationships that last are typically built on mutual respect, shared interests, trust, and emotional connection.

While physical attraction can spark a relationship, it’s these deeper foundations that keep it burning. Without these elements, the relationship usually lacks substance and longevity.

4) They may struggle with self-esteem issues

It’s not always about vanity or superficiality.

Sometimes, men who prioritize looks in their partners are dealing with their own self-esteem issues. They might see the physical attractiveness of their partner as a reflection of their own worth.

These men might believe that being with a physically attractive partner will make them more accepted or admired by others. It’s a way for them to boost their own self-confidence, but it’s also a heavy burden to carry for both parties.

They are likely struggling with inner insecurities that they may not even be aware of. Encourage open and honest communication about these feelings.

It might be beneficial for them to seek professional help to work through these self-esteem issues.

5) They tend to compare you with others

Another common trait of men who prioritize looks is the tendency to compare their partners with others.

It could be a casual remark about how a certain celebrity looks, or a comparison with an acquaintance or even an ex. These comparisons can sometimes feel like indirect criticisms and can be quite hurtful.

We’ve all been there, right? We’ve felt that sting when we’re compared to someone else, especially when it comes to our physical appearance. It can make us question our self-worth and attractiveness.

It’s important to communicate how these comparisons make you feel. A healthy relationship should make you feel loved and appreciated for who you are, not how you stack up against others.

6) They might neglect emotional connection

I remember a friend who was in a relationship with a man who prioritized looks above all else.

She often complained that while they went to the fanciest places and received compliments from strangers about being a “good-looking couple,” there was something vital missing—an emotional connection.

This man would shower her with compliments about her looks and buy her glamorous dresses, but he hardly ever asked about her day or her feelings.

He seemed more interested in how she looked on his arm rather than getting to know her on a deeper level.

Psychology backs up this experience. According to experts like Dr. Arthur Aron, who discusses relationship dynamics in the APA’s Speaking of Psychology podcast on lasting love, an emotional connection is what truly sustains a relationship over time.

While looks can be an initial attraction point, it’s the deeper emotional bond that gives relationships meaning and longevity​.

7) They may not appreciate your non-physical qualities

When a man prioritizes looks in a partner, he might overlook your non-physical attributes.

Your intelligence, kindness, sense of humor, or other qualities that make you uniquely you may not receive the appreciation they deserve.

And let’s be honest here. That’s not fair to you. You’re more than just a pretty face. Your worth isn’t measured by your physical attractiveness, but by the content of your character.

It’s important for you to know this and stand by it. Don’t let anyone make you feel less than because they fail to see your true value.

A partner who truly loves and respects you will appreciate all aspects of who you are, not just your looks.

Wrapping up

If you find yourself in a relationship where physical appearance is prioritized above all else, it’s important to remember that you deserve more than surface-level validation.

Relationships built primarily on looks often miss the deeper emotional connection that sustains love over time. This can leave you feeling undervalued, especially if your partner fails to recognize and appreciate your non-physical qualities.

It’s normal to doubt yourself in these situations, but keep in mind that your worth extends far beyond physical beauty.

Emotional connection, mutual respect, and shared values are the true pillars of lasting relationships. If you feel that your partner is neglecting these aspects, it’s worth having an open conversation about your needs.

It’s also essential to reflect on whether this dynamic truly fulfills you in the long run.

If self-doubt creeps in, ask yourself if you’re being seen and appreciated for all that you are—not just how you look. Seeking guidance from a relationship counselor can be a helpful step toward building a more balanced and emotionally fulfilling relationship​.

Ultimately, you deserve a partnership where both your outer and inner qualities are equally valued.

What would Jesus say?

Unsure whether to move on from a failed marriage? Struggling with desire and feeling guilty for it? Wanting to live a life Jesus would be proud of?

Let Jesus tell you how to be a good Christian according to the teachings of the Bible.

We brought Jesus back to life with the help of AI. Ask your toughest life questions, and Jesus will tell you exactly what to do.

Check it out here.

 

Tara Whitmore

Tara Whitmore

Tara Whitmore is a psychologist based in Melbourne, with a passion for helping people build healthier relationships and navigate life’s emotional ups and downs. Her articles blend practical psychology with relatable insights, offering readers guidance on everything from communication skills to managing stress in everyday life. When Tara isn’t busy writing or working with clients, she loves to unwind by practicing yoga or trying her hand at pottery—anything that lets her get creative and stay mindful.

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