People who are afraid to truly let go and be themselves usually exhibit these 9 behaviors

Being true to ourselves — it’s a concept we often hear, but how many of us can genuinely say we live it?

Do we embrace our quirks, our passions, our fears, and not be afraid to let them show?

There are certain behaviors that people who struggle with this tend to exhibit.

It’s like a form of self-protection, a shield they put up to prevent potential judgment or rejection.

I believe recognizing these behaviors can help us understand not only others but also ourselves better. Here are 9 behaviors of people who are afraid to truly let go and be themselves. 

Let’s dive in!

1) They’re overly concerned with people’s opinions

When it comes to authenticity, being overly concerned with what others think can be a significant roadblock.

People who are afraid to truly let go and be themselves often give excessive weight to others’ opinions. It’s almost like they’re trying to fit into a mold that they believe is socially acceptable.

But here’s the catch.

This isn’t about simply caring about how others view them – which is a completely human thing to do. It’s more about letting these external views dictate their identity, their actions, even their sense of self-worth.

In trying to meet everyone else’s expectations, they might lose sight of who they truly are. 

2) They struggle with perfectionism

Now, here’s something you might not expect.

Perfectionism.

It’s a term we often associate with high achievers, meticulous planners, or the ones who have an eye for detail.

But did you know it can also be an indicator of fear in expressing one’s true self?

Indeed.

Perfectionism, in this context, goes beyond striving for excellence. It’s about a deep-seated need to avoid mistakes at all costs, fearing that any slip-up might expose their ‘imperfect’ self.

This constant pursuit of flawlessness can become exhausting and even paralyzing. It can lead to procrastination, as the fear of making a mistake prevents them from starting or finishing a task.

But here’s the thing.

In their quest for perfection, they may hide their authentic selves, suppress their unique ideas or perspectives, all because they’re not ‘perfect’. 

3) They rarely engage in self-deprecating humor

Now, this might seem counter-intuitive. After all, isn’t self-deprecation a sign of low self-esteem?

Not necessarily.

In fact, psychologists suggest that healthy self-deprecating humor often reflects a strong sense of self-confidence and authenticity.

It shows that you’re comfortable enough with your imperfections to laugh at them, to share them openly with others.

However, for those afraid to be their true selves, any form of self-deprecation might feel like they’re exposing their ‘flaws’ to the world. They may fear that it would make them look weak or less than perfect.

4) They have a hard time saying no

Ever found it difficult to say no, even when you desperately wanted to?

You’re not alone.

People who shy away from being vulnerable struggle with this. They have a hard time setting boundaries and asserting their needs.

The fear is that saying no might disappoint others, cause conflict, or make them seem unkind or selfish.

But here’s a different perspective.

Being able to say no is about respecting your own time, energy, and needs. It’s acknowledging that you can’t please everyone without exhausting yourself or compromising your authenticity.

5) They mask their true feelings

Another common behavior they may exhibit is masking their true feelings.

Instead of expressing what they genuinely feel, they might:

• Put on a brave face when they’re actually hurting
• Laugh off a situation that actually upset them
• Pretend to be okay with something when they’re not

This masking is a form of self-protection, a way to avoid potential confrontation or judgment. 

But in doing so, they may suppress their authentic emotions and prevent themselves from truly connecting with others on a deeper level.

6) They’re uncomfortable with compliments

I’ve noticed something interesting in my interactions with people. Those who are scared to be their true selves often seem uneasy when complimented.

Odd, right?

Well, it’s not about modesty or humility. It’s more about a fear that the compliment might not align with their perceived self-image. They might think, “If they really knew me, they wouldn’t say that.”

We all have moments of self-doubt, but for these individuals, accepting compliments can be a real struggle. It’s as if they don’t believe they deserve the praise or are worried it might expose them somehow.

7) They constantly compare themselves to others

Imagine you’re scrolling through social media and stumble upon a friend’s post about their latest achievement. How do you react?

People who fear being authentic often fall into the trap of comparison. They look at others’ successes, their lifestyles, their happiness, and measure their own worth against it.

But what happens when you’re constantly comparing yourself to others?

You might start feeling inadequate, like you’re not doing enough or not good enough. This could lead to self-doubt and fear of revealing your true self, thinking it’s not as impressive or worthy.

8) They’re always in control

I had a friend who was always in control. Be it a group project, a road trip, or even a casual dinner plan, she had to have the final say. 

It took me a while to realize that this was her way of protecting herself from potential criticism or judgment.

People who are reluctant to show who they really are often feel the need to be in control all the time. Losing control could reveal their ‘imperfect’ sides or leave them vulnerable to others’ opinions.

But life is unpredictable and messy, and there’s beauty in that chaos. When we embrace this uncertainty, we allow ourselves to grow, learn, and be our true selves.

9) They rarely engage in self-reflection

And here we are, the final point.

Self-reflection, the act of turning inward and analyzing our thoughts, actions, and emotions, is a powerful tool for personal growth. It helps us understand ourselves better and encourages us to be more authentic.

But for those who are afraid to show their true selves, self-reflection can be intimidating. It requires courage to confront our flaws, fears, and insecurities. It means facing the possibility that we might not like everything we see.

What can we do to overcome this fear?

Understanding these behaviors is the first step. But how can we move forward and overcome this fear of being ourselves?

Here are a few suggestions:

• Practice self-compassion: Recognize your imperfections and embrace them as part of your uniqueness.
• Engage in mindfulness: Stay present in the moment rather than worrying about others’ perceptions.
• Seek professional help: If the fear feels overwhelming, consider seeking help from a therapist or counselor.

It’s important to remember that this journey towards embracing our authentic selves isn’t always easy. It requires patience, courage, and a lot of self-love.

But isn’t it worth it?

To be able to freely express who we are, to live by our values, to build genuine relationships – these are the rewards of authenticity.

And they’re within our reach, if only we’re willing to let go of our fears and truly be ourselves.