People who can be really exhausting to be around usually display these 7 behaviors (without realizing it)

Ever been around someone who leaves you feeling completely wiped out? It’s like they’ve got this invisible energy vacuum, and by the time you’re done hanging out, you’re ready for a nap. 

The funny (and frustrating) part? They probably have no idea they’re doing it! 

Spending time with emotionally draining people isn’t just about tolerating their quirks — it can take a real toll on your mental and emotional well-being. 

Let’s break down some of the common ways people can unknowingly exhaust those around them — and maybe, just maybe, help make those interactions a little smoother for everyone involved.

1) Constant negativity

Ever spent time with someone who always sees the glass as half empty?

This is a classic sign of an energy drainer. They often view things from a negative perspective, and it’s not just their outlook – it’s how they communicate it to others, too.

For instance, you might be excited about a new project at work, but they’ll only point out the potential pitfalls and problems.

Or perhaps you’re looking forward to a weekend getaway, but they’d only focus on the hassles of travel.

They might not even realize they’re doing this. To them, it might just feel like being realistic or cautious. But to those around them, it can be really exhausting.

The key here is not to let their negativity affect you. It’s not your job to fix their outlook or make them see the bright side of things. 

It’s okay to distance yourself from their negativity if it’s affecting your own well-being. 

2) Overly positive

While it might seem strange, people who are always overly positive can also be quite draining.

Yes, positivity is generally a good thing, but when it’s constant and unrelenting, it might feel like they’re ignoring or dismissing the realities of life.

For example, if you’re having a tough day and they respond with, “Just keep smiling!”, it can feel like they’re not validating your feelings. 

Or if you’re facing a challenge and their advice is always along the lines of “Just believe in yourself and everything will be fine”, it might come off as dismissive rather than supportive.

This isn’t to say that positivity is bad – far from it. A positive outlook can be incredibly beneficial. 

But when it’s used to gloss over real issues or avoid difficult conversations, it can become exhausting.

3) One-sided conversations

It’s natural to want to share our experiences and thoughts, but a conversation should be a two-way street.

If you find yourself doing all the listening while the other person does all the talking, it can feel draining.

Interestingly, our brains release dopamine, a feel-good hormone, when we talk about ourselves. So, it’s not surprising that some people can get carried away with this.

But being on the receiving end of a one-sided conversation isn’t as rewarding.

If you find yourself in this situation, try gently steering the conversation towards a more balanced exchange. 

4) Lack of personal boundaries

Some people have a hard time understanding and respecting personal boundaries.

Whether it’s constantly interrupting your alone time, asking overly personal questions, or not respecting your space, it can feel really tiring to be around such individuals.

These individuals may simply have a different understanding of what constitutes personal space and privacy.

It could also be that they’re so eager to connect that they unintentionally cross lines.

It can help if you gently but firmly establish your boundaries. Let them know what you’re comfortable with and what feels intrusive to you. 

5) Constant competition

We’ve all been there: you share a small accomplishment or a new interest, and suddenly the conversation turns into a competition. 

Whether it’s about who has the better job, whose kids are smarter, or who can run faster, being around someone who constantly turns everything into a contest can be exhausting.

It’s like they’re always trying to one-up you, and it can make even casual conversations feel like an exhausting marathon. 

In reality, they might just be trying to connect or feel good about themselves, not realizing that their competitive nature is wearing you down.

6) Always on the go

Have you ever known someone who just can’t sit still? They’re always on the move, planning the next big thing, juggling multiple projects – the pace can be dizzying.

While their drive can be admirable, it can also be quite exhausting to keep up with.

I once knew a person who was constantly planning the next adventure, whether it was a weekend hiking trip or a month-long backpacking journey. It was exciting at first, but it quickly became tiring. 

I often felt like I was merely catching my breath from one adventure when we were already onto planning the next.

It’s important to understand that being around such high-energy individuals can be draining, especially if you’re more of a slow-and-steady type.

7) The eternal critic

Some people have a knack for pointing out flaws and mistakes, no matter how small.

They might think they’re helping by offering “constructive criticism,” but constant criticism can be incredibly draining.

Whether it’s your cooking, your outfit, or your work, nothing seems to escape their critical eye.

And while feedback can be valuable, there’s a difference between helpful suggestions and constant nitpicking.

Let’s be clear: it’s not your job to meet their standards or please them at all times. If you’re doing your best and they still find fault, the problem lies with them, not you.

Don’t let their critical nature undermine your self-esteem.

You are more than capable, and their endless critiques are a reflection of their issues, not your worth.

Stand your ground and don’t be afraid to let them know when their criticism is unwelcome or unhelpful.

Final thoughts

Being around draining people can be challenging, but you have the right to protect your energy.

If someone’s behavior consistently leaves you feeling exhausted, it’s okay to create distance. You’re not obliged to endure draining situations indefinitely.

Your time, energy, and emotional health are valuable. Don’t let draining individuals deplete them. Prioritizing your well-being isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. 

The choice to protect your well-being is ultimately yours to make. The time you spend nurturing your own mental and emotional health is never wasted.

Being mindful of your interactions doesn’t mean you have to cut people out of your life or be harsh.

It simply means acknowledging the impact certain behaviors have on you, and taking steps to ensure you’re not constantly drained.

Here’s to fostering healthier interactions, maintaining your energy levels, and living a happier, more balanced life!