People who cut off family and friends over different political views usually display these 7 behaviors, according to psychology

Have you ever found yourself in a heated debate with a loved one, only to realize the conversation isn’t about understanding but winning?

In today’s hyper-polarized world, it’s becoming more common for people to draw hard lines over political differences. And sometimes, those lines turn into walls, cutting off family and friends altogether.

I’ve seen it happen, and maybe you have too—a holiday dinner that turns tense or a once-close relationship quietly fading after an argument over the latest headline.

But what drives someone to make such a drastic decision? According to psychology, it’s rarely just about politics. It’s often tied to deeper behaviors and emotional patterns.

In this article, we’ll explore seven key traits that people who cut ties over political disagreements tend to display.

Whether you’ve experienced this firsthand or are just curious about the psychology behind it, these insights might shed some light on why it happens—and maybe even how to prevent it.

1) They prioritize beliefs over relationships

It’s natural to feel passionate about your beliefs—after all, they’re a core part of who you are. But when those beliefs overshadow the value of personal connections, it can lead to fractured relationships.

People who cut off family and friends over political views often display a tendency to prioritize their beliefs above all else, even long-standing bonds.

This behavior usually stems from a sense that political ideology isn’t just an opinion but a moral compass—one that defines who they are and who they choose to associate with.

For them, maintaining their convictions can feel more important than preserving relationships they perceive as incompatible with their values.

This lines up with a study that explains why politics makes some of us emotional. According to the study, when our political views are challenged, the brain becomes active in regions associated with personal identity, threat response and emotions.

Psychologist Jonas Kaplan, the author of the study, further says, “We think it’s because political beliefs are important to our identity, to our sense of who we are. They are part of our social selves as well and can define who we spend time with and how they relate to us.”

While it’s easy to label this as harsh or inflexible, it’s worth considering the psychological depth behind it. Understanding this mindset can open up avenues for compassion, even if you don’t agree with their approach.

2) They struggle with perspective-taking

Another behavior I’ve noticed in these individuals is a difficulty with perspective-taking.

Let me share a personal example. A while back, a close friend of mine decided to cut ties with me over our differing political views. At first, it was challenging to comprehend why he would choose politics over our long-standing friendship.

I realized, though, that he struggled with putting himself in my shoes and understanding my viewpoint. He was so entrenched in his beliefs that he couldn’t fathom why I would think differently.

This inability to engage in perspective-taking is common among those who cut off family and friends over politics. They find it hard to empathize or see things from another person’s viewpoint, especially when it comes to deeply-held beliefs.

It’s a complex behavior, but understanding it can help us better navigate these tricky situations.

3) They display all-or-nothing thinking

What’s intriguing is that individuals who cut off ties due to political differences often display a cognitive distortion known as all-or-nothing thinking.

This sort of thinking involves seeing situations in black and white, without recognizing the grey areas. In the context of political views, it translates to a belief that one’s own political stance is completely correct, while any differing views are entirely wrong.

In fact, according to a 2016 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, this cognitive distortion is often linked to political polarization and extreme partisan attitudes.

This binary way of thinking can lead to increased conflict and ultimately, the severing of relationships. It’s a fascinating insight into the psychology behind such drastic actions.

4) They exhibit strong emotional reactions

Emotions play a key role in our decision-making process, and they’re particularly evident in those who sever ties over political differences.

These individuals often display strong emotional reactions when confronted with opposing views. These reactions can range from anger and frustration to disappointment and even feelings of betrayal.

The mere mention of a differing political viewpoint can trigger intense emotional responses, leading to heated arguments or even the end of relationships.

Again, this is due to activity in the regions of the brain associated with emotions, as I mentioned earlier.

This heightened emotional state can make it difficult for them to engage in calm, rational discussions about politics, escalating conflicts and driving wedges between them and their loved ones.

5) They have a heightened sense of fear

Fear is a powerful motivator, and it certainly plays a role in these situations.

I remember feeling bewildered when a family member suddenly cut me off over our political differences. I spent months trying to understand why it happened, until I realized that her decision was driven more by fear than by anger.

She was scared. Scared of the potential consequences she believed would come from my political views. Scared of the changes she thought they represented.

This fear led her to distance herself from anyone who held different political beliefs, in an attempt to protect herself and what she held dear.

This heightened sense of fear is often at the heart of such drastic decisions. It’s not so much about the politics per se, but about the perceived threats and fears associated with differing views.

6) They value conformity over diversity

Another characteristic common among individuals who sever ties due to political differences is their preference for conformity over diversity.

They tend to surround themselves with like-minded individuals who share their political beliefs, creating an echo chamber that reinforces their views.

Any deviation from these views is seen as a threat to their social circle and personal identity.

In such situations, the diversity of thought that comes from differing political views is not celebrated or seen as an opportunity for growth. Instead, it’s perceived as a disruption to the harmony of their social group.

This preference for conformity can lead to the isolation of those with opposing views, further polarizing relationships and communities.

7) They lack effective conflict resolution skills

The most crucial thing to understand is that at the core of these strained relationships often lies a lack of effective conflict resolution skills.

People who cut off family and friends over political differences often struggle to engage in constructive dialogue about contentious issues.

Instead of working through the disagreement, they might choose the seemingly easier route of avoiding it altogether by cutting ties.

These individuals may not have the tools or strategies necessary to handle conflict effectively, leading them to react dramatically when confronted with challenging discussions.

Understanding this can be key to finding ways to bridge these political divides and mend broken relationships.

Final thoughts: It’s about empathy

At the heart of understanding these behaviors is empathy.

When we take a step back and consider the psychology behind why some people choose to sever ties over political differences, we see that it’s often about more than just politics.

It’s about fear, a longing for conformity, a struggle with perspective-taking, and a lack of effective conflict resolution skills. It’s about deeply held beliefs and emotions that can be overwhelming.

Perhaps the most important thing we can do is to listen – really listen – to one another. To create spaces for open and respectful dialogue, where differing views are seen not as threats but as opportunities for growth and understanding.

Understanding these behaviors is the first step. The next is up to us.