People who raise disrespectful and entitled children usually display these 7 behaviors (without realizing it)

Raising respectful, well-rounded kids is no easy task, and even the best-intentioned parents can sometimes fall into habits that lead to unintended outcomes.

Without realizing it, certain behaviors can foster entitlement and disrespect in children, creating patterns that are hard to break later in life.

If you’ve ever wondered why some kids seem to act entitled while others are more grounded, it often traces back to the way they’re parented.

Here are seven common behaviors that can contribute to raising disrespectful and entitled children—often without parents even being aware of it.

This is not about parent-shaming but rather a gentle nudge towards self-awareness and positive change. After all, we’re all in the same boat, trying to figure out the sometimes messy business of parenting.

1) Too much indulgence

I’m sure every parent would agree that we all love to spoil our children every now and then.

But here’s the catch.

Constantly giving into their demands can set a dangerous precedent. It might lead them to believe that they are entitled to everything they want, whenever they want it.

Giving your child limits doesn’t mean you’re denying them happiness.

It’s about teaching them the value of patience, the importance of earning things and understanding that the world does not revolve around their whims and fancies.

After all, we’re not just raising children. We’re raising future adults. And it’s our job to prepare them for a world that won’t always cater to their every whim.

2) Lack of consistent discipline

We all know that discipline is crucial in raising respectful children. But it’s important that the rules and consequences are consistent.

Let me share a personal story.

When my son was younger, he had a habit of interrupting when I was talking. Initially, I let it slide thinking he was just eager to express his thoughts. However, this soon turned into a pattern.

He started to interrupt not just me, but others as well.

I realized my mistake. By not addressing his behavior from the start, I had indirectly told him that it was okay to interrupt others.

So, I sat down with him and explained why it was disrespectful. We agreed on a rule – if he wanted to say something while someone else was talking, he had to raise his hand.

It took a while, but eventually he understood and the interrupting stopped.

The lesson here? Consistency is key in discipline. When rules are stable and consequences are predictable, children learn to respect boundaries and understand the importance of following them.

3) Neglecting the importance of empathy

It’s a tough pill to swallow, but sometimes, we as parents forget to teach our children one of the most important life skills – empathy.

We’re often caught up in the rush of everyday life, meeting deadlines, preparing meals, attending meetings.

And in this hustle, we sometimes miss out on making our children understand the importance of stepping into someone else’s shoes.

I’ve been guilty of it too.

There were days when my daughter would complain about her friends at school, and I would quickly brush it off saying, “Oh, kids fight, you’ll be fine.”

But was I really addressing the issue? Was I making her understand the feelings of her friends?

No. I was missing a teachable moment. All I was doing was dismissing her concerns and indirectly telling her to dismiss others’ feelings as well.

New research shows that empathy is passed down from generation to generation. This means, empathetic parents raise empathetic kids.

So don’t make the same mistake I did. Don’t miss the teachable moments, and don’t forget to model empathy yourself.

Yes, it does take time and effort. But believe me, it’s worth every second. It not only makes your child respectful but also helps them grow into compassionate adults.

4) Not modeling respectful behavior

Speaking of modeling, our kids learn how to be respectful based on our behavior, too.

I remember one day, my son came home mimicking the way I talk on the phone – the tone, the gestures, everything.

It was a light-hearted moment, but it made me realize just how closely children watch us and how they mimic our behaviors.

So if we want our children to be respectful and considerate, we need to display these behaviors ourselves.

Whether it’s the way we talk to our partners, how we interact with service staff, or how we handle disagreements – our children are watching and learning.

We need to be mindful of our actions because they are shaping the future behavior of our children. Start showing them what respect looks like in your daily interactions with every person you encounter. 

5) Absence of healthy communication

As parents, we often focus on providing for our children’s physical needs. But emotional needs, like communication, are just as important.

When parents fail to create an environment where open, respectful communication is encouraged, it can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and ultimately, disrespect.

Some parents also fall into the habit of talking at their kids rather than to them. This can feel more like giving orders than engaging in meaningful conversation.

Open, honest dialogues are foundational to raising respectful and understanding kids.

When we take the time to listen to our children, validate their feelings, and communicate our expectations clearly, we are teaching them the importance of respectful interaction.

This also means expressing our own feelings and needs in a respectful way. By doing so, we’re setting a positive example for our kids on how they can express themselves without belittling or disrespecting others.

The more they feel heard and understood, the more likely they are to extend the same courtesy to others.

6) Failing to recognize their efforts

Raising children is like walking a tightrope.

On one side, we have the risk of overindulging them, and on the other, the risk of not acknowledging their efforts enough.

We often focus on correcting our children’s mistakes, but it’s equally important to recognize their efforts and appreciate their good behavior.

When my daughter spent hours helping her younger brother with his school project, I made sure to thank her and express how proud I was of her kindness and patience.

Did that make her entitled? No. Instead, it made her understand that her efforts were seen and appreciated. It encouraged her to continue being helpful and patient.

So, remember to acknowledge your child’s efforts and good behavior. It boosts their self-esteem and makes them understand the importance of kindness and respect towards others.

7) Neglecting to teach gratitude

Lastly, don’t forget to teach them how to be grateful. It’s a powerful antidote to entitlement.

It’s easy for children to take things for granted, especially in a world where instant gratification is just a click away.

However, teaching our kids to appreciate what they have can significantly shape their attitude towards life and people.

Start with small everyday things – a warm meal, a hug from a friend, or even the sunshine on a cold day. Encourage them to express their gratitude for these seemingly small things.

Because once children learn to appreciate the little things in life, they become more respectful and less entitled. They learn that not everything is a given, but rather something to be thankful for.

Final thoughts

If you’ve recognized any of these behaviors in your parenting, don’t be too hard on yourself. None of us are perfect! 

Remember, change starts with self-awareness, and you’re already halfway there just by reading this article.

Take small steps. Start by making conscious efforts to replace one behavior at a time.

It may be challenging at first, but with persistence, you’ll see a shift not just in your children’s attitude, but also in your relationship with them.

And most importantly, remember to be kind to yourself throughout this process. After all, there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. We’re all just doing our best.

So here’s to becoming more conscious, compassionate, and respectful parents – one day at a time.