7 types of people who unknowingly attract manipulators

There’s a fine line between being influenced and being manipulated.

Manipulation often disguises itself as influence, but it’s far more insidious. It’s about controlling another person’s choices without their knowledge.

Some of us, unfortunately, seem to attract these manipulators without even realizing it. It’s not about blame, it’s about identifying patterns that make us vulnerable.

In this article, we’ll explore the seven types of people who unknowingly attract manipulators. We’ll delve into the characteristics that make them easy targets and how they can protect themselves.

So, let’s uncover these types and arm ourselves with awareness.

1) People pleasers

Ever met someone who can’t say no? That’s a people pleaser.

People pleasers are the quintessential target for manipulators. They often struggle to establish boundaries, and their need for approval makes them easy targets.

Manipulators know this, capitalizing on the fact that a people pleaser will go to great lengths to avoid conflict or displeasure. The constant need to please and maintain harmony is an open invitation for manipulation.

It’s not about changing who they are, but about learning how to stand their ground. Recognizing their worth is the first step. Saying no when necessary, crucial.

And remember, pleasing everyone is impossible. It’s okay to prioritize your own needs sometimes. After all, if you don’t, who will?

2) The overempathetic

I can tell you from personal experience that being overly empathetic can leave you vulnerable to manipulators.

I’ve always been the type to deeply feel other people’s emotions. It’s a part of who I am. I used to think it was one of my greatest strengths, until I met John.

John was a coworker who always seemed to have a crisis. At first, I thought he was just going through a rough patch, so I tried to be there for him. Lend a listening ear, offer advice, even helped him out with some tasks.

But soon, it became clear that John was taking advantage of my empathy. He would guilt me into helping him with his work, saying he was too stressed or overwhelmed to handle it alone.

I eventually realized that my empathy was being exploited. Over time, I learned to set boundaries and not let John’s problems become my own.

The lesson here? Being empathetic is a wonderful trait but remember to protect your own emotional well-being too. Not everyone who seems distressed is genuinely in need. Some are simply manipulators in disguise.

3) The insecure

Insecurity can be a breeding ground for manipulation. Those who lack self-confidence often question their worth and abilities, making them susceptible to the manipulator’s tactics.

Did you know that individuals with low self-esteem are more likely to stay in harmful relationships? This is because they may believe they don’t deserve better or fear they won’t find anyone else.

Manipulators prey on this vulnerability, using it to control and belittle, further eroding the insecure person’s self-esteem.

Building self-confidence and recognizing one’s worth is vital in breaking this cycle. Remember, everyone deserves respect and kindness, and no one should have to settle for less.

4) The naive

Innocence and naivety can be charming qualities, but they can also make someone an easy target for manipulation.

Naive individuals often believe in the inherent goodness of people. They tend to take things at face value and struggle to see the hidden motives behind actions.

This trust can be exploited by manipulators who twist words and actions to serve their own needs. It’s a subtle form of manipulation that leaves the naive individual confused and questioning their own judgment.

The key here is awareness. Learning to question, to seek clarity, and not ignore those little red flags that something isn’t quite right.

Trust is essential, but so is protecting oneself from those who would misuse it.

5) The fixers

I’ve always been a fixer. I see a problem, I want to solve it. I see someone in distress, I want to make it better.

Fixers have a natural instinct to help and heal. But this can also lead them into relationships where they’re constantly trying to “fix” the other person, often at the cost of their own well-being.

Manipulators can sense this and play the role of the ‘broken’ individual, feeding off the fixer’s need to help and manipulating them into a cycle of dependency.

As a recovering fixer, I’ve learned that not all problems are mine to solve. It’s important to distinguish between supporting someone and enabling their destructive behaviors. Sometimes, stepping back is the best thing you can do.

6) The selfless

While a selfless nature is an admirable trait, it can also serve as a beacon for manipulators.

Selfless individuals often prioritize the needs of others above their own. They give their time, energy, and resources, frequently at their own expense.

Unfortunately, manipulators see this as an opportunity to take advantage. They exploit the selflessness, demanding more and more, while giving back little in return.

The challenge for the selfless is to find balance. It’s not about becoming selfish, but about understanding that it’s okay to put your needs first sometimes. After all, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

7) The non-confrontational

Lastly, people who have a fear of conflict can be a magnet for manipulators. 

Why? Because it’s easier to use that fear to control and get their way without resistance. 

Non-confrontational individuals will often go to great lengths to avoid arguments or discord. This fear can lead them to comply with the manipulator’s demands, even when they disagree.

The most important thing to remember here is that conflict isn’t always negative. Sometimes, it’s necessary for growth and boundary setting. It’s okay to stand up for yourself and your beliefs. Your voice matters just as much as anyone else’s.

The crux: It’s about self-awareness

Peeling back the layers of human behavior and vulnerability, we find that self-awareness plays a critical role.

Whether we’re people pleasers, the overempathetic, insecure, naive, fixers, selfless or non-confrontational, the common thread to all these types is a lack of self-awareness.

Manipulators thrive on this lack of awareness. They exploit our blind spots, our vulnerabilities and our fears. But they can only do so if we let them.

Understanding our personal tendencies and acknowledging our weaknesses is the first step toward becoming less susceptible to manipulation. It’s not about changing who we are, but about protecting ourselves by setting boundaries and recognizing when they’re being crossed.

Knowledge truly is power, and the key to breaking free from manipulation lies within you. It’s about knowing yourself and being brave enough to stand your ground.

And of course, it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. Because you matter too.