8 signs someone is actually a liability in your life (not an asset)

We’ve all heard the saying, “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

But what happens when one of those people isn’t lifting you up, but subtly dragging you down?

In life, the company you keep can either propel you toward your goals or hold you back in ways that aren’t always obvious at first.

While some people are true assets—supportive, motivating, and dependable—others can slowly chip away at your peace, progress, and potential.

So, how do you spot the difference?

Today, we’re uncovering 8 clear signs someone in your life may actually be a liability, not an asset.

Let’s dive in:

1) Constant negativity

We’ve all encountered those people who seem to have a dark cloud permanently hanging over their heads.

As noted by experts, negativity is contagious, and it can significantly impact your mood, mental health, and overall outlook on life.

If you find that someone in your life is constantly negative, always complaining, and never able to see the bright side of things, it’s a clear warning sign.

While it’s normal to have bad days and vent from time to time, a constant stream of negativity can be draining.

You should surround yourself with people who lift you up, inspire you, and encourage positivity.

2) Unreciprocated effort

Relationships, be it personal or professional, should ideally be a two-way street.

I recall having a friend who always seemed to need my support and assistance.

I was there for them through thick and thin, always ready to lend a hand or a listening ear.

But one day, when I needed their support during a challenging phase in my life, they were nowhere to be found.

My calls were ignored, texts unanswered, and requests for help dismissed.

That’s when it dawned on me: the effort I was putting into our relationship was not being reciprocated.

Their lack of support made me feel like I was carrying the weight of the relationship on my shoulders alone.

It was exhausting and one-sided.

Are you constantly giving and never receiving? It’s a clear sign that someone is a liability in your life.

A balanced relationship should involve mutual support and understanding. 

3) They don’t have any goals

Ever notice how some people seem content just drifting through life without any clear direction?

While it’s fine to take life as it comes sometimes, a lack of ambition or goals can quickly become a red flag.

Surrounding yourself with individuals who have no aspirations, no plans for growth, and no vision for their future can stagnate your own progress.

People without goals tend to stay in their comfort zone, and that energy can rub off on you.

Without someone pushing themselves forward, there’s little motivation for you to push yourself.

True assets in your life should inspire you to aim higher, not stay stagnant.

4) They don’t value you

Everyone deserves to be cherished, respected, and valued.

When you have someone in your life who constantly belittles your achievements, overlooks your worth, and treats you as lesser than, it can be incredibly damaging to your self-esteem and sense of self-worth.

No one should make you feel like you’re not good enough or that you have to change who you are to be accepted.

It’s heartbreaking, but if someone continually fails to see your worth and appreciate you for who you are, they are a liability in your life.

5) They are overly competitive

So, let’s say you share exciting news—maybe you landed a promotion or hit a personal milestone.

Instead of celebrating with you, they immediately one-up your achievement or subtly downplay it.

Sound familiar?

Overly competitive friends can make everything feel like a contest.

Rather than being happy for your success, they see it as a threat or something to outdo.

This constant rivalry isn’t just exhausting; it’s toxic.

Experts, including those at WebMD, widely acknowledge that excessive competition is a sign of a bad friend.

Healthy relationships thrive on mutual support, not the need to always come out on top.

6) They can’t be relied on

Have you ever made plans with someone, only to be left hanging at the last minute? Or maybe you’ve needed help during a tough time, and they were nowhere to be found?

Reliability is a cornerstone of any strong relationship.

When you can’t count on someone to follow through—whether it’s showing up on time, keeping a promise, or simply being there when needed—that person becomes more of a burden than a benefit.

7) They’re constantly causing drama

We’ve all encountered individuals who seem to thrive on drama.

They constantly stir up trouble, create conflict, and can’t seem to live without some sort of chaos in their lives.

This constant need for drama can be draining and exhausting to those around them.

Instead of peaceful interactions, you find yourself constantly embroiled in unnecessary conflicts and problems.

You deserve peace, harmony, and positive interactions in your life.

Don’t let anyone rob you of that!

8) They don’t respect your boundaries

Boundaries are essential in any relationship.

As noted by the folks at Psych Central, “Setting boundaries has various benefits for promoting overall mental health and well-being.”

Basically, They help protect your mental, emotional, and physical space.

If someone consistently disrespects or ignores your boundaries, it’s a significant red flag.

It shows a lack of respect for you as an individual and for your personal space and needs.

This behavior can lead to feelings of discomfort, resentment, and can even be damaging to your mental health.

Anyone who fails to respect your boundaries is a liability in your life.

You deserve relationships that honor and respect you, including your boundaries.

Final thought: It’s about self-respect

At the heart of this discussion lies a fundamental principle: self-respect.

Self-respect is not just about how you view yourself, but also how you allow others to treat you.

It’s about acknowledging your worth and ensuring that others recognize it too.

Remember, people can only treat you in the way you let them.

If someone in your life is more of a liability than an asset, it might be time to reassess the relationship.

It’s not always easy to let go, especially when emotions are involved, but sometimes it’s necessary for your well-being.

You deserve to be surrounded by people who enrich your life, respect you, and reciprocate your efforts.

Life is too precious to spend with those who drain you or bring you down.

Choose wisely who you invite on your journey!

What would Jesus say?

Unsure whether to move on from a failed marriage? Struggling with desire and feeling guilty for it? Wanting to live a life Jesus would be proud of?

Let Jesus tell you how to be a good Christian according to the teachings of the Bible.

We brought Jesus back to life with the help of AI. Ask your toughest life questions, and Jesus will tell you exactly what to do.

Check it out here.

 

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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