7 types of people who can make your life miserable, says psychology

Ever feel like certain people just drain the life out of you, leaving you frustrated, anxious, or even miserable?

I’ve been there more times than I care to admit. Whether it was a toxic coworker, a backstabbing friend, or even a family member, some people have the uncanny ability to make everything feel heavier.

In this article, we’ll uncover seven types of people who can wreak havoc on your mental well-being. Trust me, recognizing them early on can make all the difference.

Let’s dive in!

1) The constant critic

We all know one – that person who has an opinion about everything and isn’t shy about sharing it.

This type is an expert at finding faults, often pointing out your shortcomings with a certain delight. They have a knack for turning even the most trivial matters into a critique of your character or abilities.

The constant critic can sap your self-esteem and make your life miserable if you let them. This is well backed up by research; a study way back up in 1988, for instance, found that people who were on the receiving end of destructive criticism reported more anger and tension. 

Recognizing their tactics is the first step in dealing with them effectively. You don’t have to accept the unnecessary negativity they bring into your life.

2) The friend who treats you like a therapist

They say “a problem shared is a problem halved,” but sometimes it can feel like the problem just doubles instead.

We all want to be there for our friends, but there’s a big difference between supporting someone and becoming their emotional dumping ground.

This friend constantly unloads all their issues on you, turning every conversation into a therapy session. After a while, it can start to feel draining, especially if they never seem to take your advice or reciprocate when you need support.

Psychologists refer to this dynamic as “compassion fatigue,” where constantly absorbing someone else’s emotional burden leaves you feeling mentally exhausted. If you’re not careful, you might find yourself feeling overwhelmed and resentful in the friendship.

Setting healthy boundaries is key here—because your well-being matters too.

3) The perpetual victim

Meet the perpetual victim, the person who always seems to be at the mercy of their circumstances, never taking any responsibility for their actions or their life.

Experts note that this mindset, often referred to as a victim mentality, can be a result of past trauma or abuse.

It’s a way of coping with difficult situations by shifting the blame and responsibility onto others.

As sad as this is, the perpetual victim can bring you down by constantly drawing you into their drama. They often demand excessive attention and sympathy, while offering little or no support in return.

The solution? Offer empathy while also encouraging personal responsibility.

4) The manipulator

Ever met someone who seems to always get their way, no matter what?

You might be dealing with a manipulator.

These individuals are experts at bending people to their will, often using guilt, fear, or even charm to achieve their goals. They sap your energy by twisting situations and conversations to their advantage, leaving you feeling used and disoriented.

Basically, they see relationships as a means to an end, with little regard for the feelings of those involved.

Becoming aware of their tactics is crucial. Don’t be afraid to stand your ground and assert your own needs in the face of manipulation. Walk away if necessary. 

5) The energy zapper

There was this colleague I had at my old job. Every morning, he would walk into the office radiating negativity. His constant complaining and pessimism quickly spread a cloud of dreariness over the entire team. Sound like someone you know?

This person, known as the energy zapper, is someone who always seems to be in a bad mood and takes pleasure in spreading their gloom.

The worst part is their negativity is often contagious – studies back this up. These people can make your life unhappy by constantly pulling you into their negativity spiral.

It’s important to protect your own mental and emotional health when dealing with energy zappers. Surrounding yourself with positive influences can help counter their negative impact.

6) The unwanted therapist

I mentioned earlier the friend who treats you like a therapist, but what about the person who turns the tables and tries to be your therapist—without being asked?

This is the unwanted therapist, always ready to offer unsolicited advice, even when you don’t need or want it.

While their intentions may be good, constantly stepping in with solutions or “helpful” critiques can make you feel judged or incapable of handling your own problems. Instead of listening, they’re quick to jump in with answers, turning every conversation into a lecture.

Over time, their well-meaning but intrusive advice can wear you down, making you feel unheard and invalidated. It’s okay to set boundaries and let them know when you need a listening ear—not a life coach.

7) The non-stop narcissist

The most destructive of all is the non-stop narcissist. This person has an inflated sense of self-importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.

Their behaviour revolves around their own needs and desires. They can make your life miserable by constantly prioritizing themselves at the expense of others.

Dealing with narcissists can be incredibly challenging due to their disregard for others’ feelings. The most crucial thing to remember when dealing with a narcissist is not to take their behavior personally. Their actions are a reflection of their character, not yours.

Final thoughts: It’s all about boundaries

I hope you found this post helpful in identifying some of the people who may be quietly draining your energy and making life more difficult than it needs to be.

Recognizing these types of behaviors is the first step in protecting your mental well-being and setting healthy boundaries. 

You don’t have to let these people control your life. You have the power to choose who you surround yourself with and how much influence they have over your emotional space.

Take care of yourself—you deserve it!

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Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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