7 types of people you should never take advice from, according to psychology

For most of my life, I’ve been a magnet for bad advice.

You know the type:

– The friend who always knows best

– The co-worker who thinks they’re a life coach

– The family member stuck in their ways.

As the founder of Hack Spirit and a psychology enthusiast, I’ve spent years trying to navigate through the maze of advice, both good and bad.

The result? I’ve learned the hard way that not all advice is created equal.

In this article, I’m going to break down who these people are. Hopefully, it can save you some of the headaches and heartaches I’ve had to endure.

Let’s dive in.

1) The know-it-all

The first type of person you should never take advice from is the know-it-all.

We all know someone like this. They seem to have an opinion on everything, even topics they’re not well-versed in.

As a psychology enthusiast, this was one of the first lessons I learned: just because someone speaks with confidence, it doesn’t mean they know what they’re talking about.

Taking advice from a know-it-all can lead to plenty of wrong turns. Their certainty can be compelling, but it’s often misplaced.

Remember, a little doubt is a good thing. It prompts us to question, to learn, and to grow. The next time a self-proclaimed expert offers you advice, take a moment to consider their credentials.

Are they truly knowledgeable about the subject at hand? Or are they just good at sounding like they are?

Discerning between the two can save you a lot of trouble down the road.

2) The eternal pessimist

The second type of person you should never take advice from is the eternal pessimist.

I once had a friend who saw the world in shades of grey. He always expected the worst and, unsurprisingly, his advice reflected this.

“Try something new? Why bother, it probably won’t work out anyway,” he’d say.

Accepting his advice meant adopting a defeatist attitude and I quickly realized it wasn’t doing me any good.

As Carl Jung, one of the most influential psychologists of the 20th century, famously said: “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”

This quote reminded me that we have control over our own lives and how we perceive things. Despite life’s inevitable ups and downs, we can choose to approach situations with optimism and resilience.

So, be wary of advice from eternal pessimists. Their negativity is a reflection of their mindset, not your reality. You’re capable of achieving more than you think. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

3) The green-eyed advisor

The third type of person you should steer clear of when seeking advice is the green-eyed advisor, or in plain terms, the jealous one.

I remember a time when I was planning to start Hack Spirit. An old friend of mine, who had always dreamt of starting his own business but never did, subtly discouraged me. His advice was always laced with hesitation and doubt.

“Are you sure you can handle it?” “What if it fails?” “Isn’t it safer to stick with your current job?”

It wasn’t until much later that I recognized these questions for what they were – manifestations of his own insecurities and jealousy.

Jealousy can cloud judgment and color advice. It’s important to recognize this bias and take such advice with a grain of salt.

Remember, your path is yours alone. Others may try to sway you based on their own fears or unfulfilled dreams, but only you know what’s truly best for you.

4) The unsolicited advisor

The fourth type of person to avoid when seeking advice is the unsolicited advisor.

You know the ones – they’re always ready to offer their opinion, even when you didn’t ask for it.

I recall a time when a distant relative, upon learning about my interest in psychology, started bombarding me with career advice out of the blue. His ‘guidance’ was more confusing than helpful.

Interestingly, a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that unsolicited advice-givers are often perceived as more domineering and less knowledgeable.

According to the study, these individuals may offer advice without fully understanding the situation or considering the advisee’s perspective, leading to unhelpful or even harmful suggestions.

So, it’s wise to be cautious when someone starts dispensing advice without being asked. It’s essential to remember that you have the right to make your own decisions and that not all advice is good advice.

5) The constant critic

The fifth person to be wary of when seeking advice is the constant critic.

I used to work with someone who had a knack for finding fault in everything. Whether it was a project proposal or a casual suggestion for lunch, he always had something negative to say.

His advice, unsurprisingly, was always wrapped in harsh criticism and veiled insults. It was draining and did nothing but undermine my confidence.

The issue with critics is that their advice is often less about helping you and more about asserting their superiority. Their critiques may not be constructive or useful but rather a means to belittle others.

There’s a difference between constructive criticism and constant negativity. Be cautious of those who seem more interested in tearing down your ideas than helping you improve them.

6) The drama queen or king

The sixth type of person to avoid when seeking advice is the drama queen or king.

I once had a roommate who thrived on drama. She had a flair for exaggerating situations and turning minor issues into major crises.

One evening, I asked her opinion on a dilemma I was facing at work. Instead of offering practical advice, she spun a dramatic tale of potential disaster and conflict. It only served to heighten my anxiety instead of helping me find a solution.

As renowned psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” The same can be said for advice. Good advice isn’t about creating panic or feeding into drama; it’s about providing consistent, level-headed guidance to help someone overcome their challenges.

So, be careful when seeking advice from those who love drama. Their theatrics can cloud their judgment and lead to exaggerated or irrational suggestions.

7) The successful one

Now, this may seem counterintuitive, but the seventh type of person to be cautious of when seeking advice is the seemingly successful one.

Success is often perceived as a sign of wisdom and knowledge, and while this can certainly be true, it’s essential to remember that success is subjective and often depends on personal circumstances and luck.

I once sought advice from a successful entrepreneur, assuming his achievements guaranteed sound guidance. However, his advice, based on his own unique experiences and opportunities, wasn’t practical or applicable to my situation.

Renowned psychologist Richard Wiseman in his book “The Luck Factor” talks about how success often comes down to being in the right place at the right time. It’s not always about making the ‘correct’ choices.

When seeking advice from successful individuals, always remember to factor in your own circumstances and goals. Their path to success may not be the one for you. It’s all about finding what works best for your unique situation.

Always ask yourself – “Does this advice apply to my specific circumstances?” If the answer is no, feel free to politely disregard it and move on.

Conclusion

Navigating the world of advice can be tricky, but being aware of these seven types of people to avoid can make things a lot easier.

Remember, the best advice usually comes from those who listen, empathize, and offer guidance based on their wisdom and your unique situation.

And most importantly, trust yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else. Use others’ advice as a guide, but always remember that the final decision is yours.

The next time you seek advice, take a moment to consider the source. Is it coming from a place of understanding and support? If not, it might be best to seek guidance elsewhere. Trust your gut; it often knows what’s best for you.