Women who are highly intelligent but have very little self-confidence often display these 8 behaviors

There’s a fascinating paradox that exists in many of us, particularly women. You may be incredibly smart, yet struggle with low self-confidence.

It’s a baffling, yet common phenomenon. You’ve got all the smarts, the intellectual horsepower, but lack the belief in your abilities.

It’s like having a high-end sports car but not trusting it to go over 20 mph.

Psychologists have identified certain behaviors that are common in highly intelligent women with low self-confidence.

If you find yourself nodding along to these behaviors, know that you’re not alone and there are ways to boost your self-belief.

Let’s dive into this intriguing world of smart women who underestimate their potential.

1) Overthinking

It’s a peculiar quirk that comes with high intelligence – overthinking. And when accompanied by low self-confidence, it can spin into a whirlpool of self-doubt.

Highly intelligent women are often caught in an endless loop of analyzing, re-analyzing, and then analyzing some more.

They question their decisions, their words, their actions – even their own thoughts.

It’s as if they’re on a constant quest for perfection, yet no answer ever seems good enough. They’re like detectives scrutinizing every clue but never solving the case.

Psychologists have noticed this overthinking trend among smart women with low self-confidence.

It’s like they’re using their intellectual horsepower to fuel their insecurities rather than drive their potential.

This overthinking often stems from a deep-seated fear of failure or not living up to expectations. And it can be quite draining, to say the least.

But remember, ladies, overthinking is not a sign of weakness. It’s just your brilliant mind running on overdrive.

The trick is learning how to steer it in the right direction.

2) Downplaying achievements

Another common behavior I’ve noticed, and even experienced myself, is the tendency to downplay achievements.

Let me share a little story. I’ve always been a high achiever academically.

But whenever I’d get praised for my accomplishments, I’d often brush it off with something like, “Oh, it was nothing. I just got lucky,” or “Anyone could have done it.”

Sound familiar?

It’s like there’s this internal voice that keeps saying we’re not deserving of the praise or that we’re just frauds waiting to be exposed.

This is also known as Impostor Syndrome, a term that’s been buzzing around in the psychology world.

Highly intelligent women with low self-confidence often find it hard to accept compliments or acknowledge their achievements.

They tend to attribute their success to external factors like luck, rather than their own abilities or hard work.

But here’s the thing – downplaying your achievements doesn’t make you humble, it just prevents you from seeing your worth. 

3) Fear of being seen as arrogant

While confidence is often lauded, there’s a thin line between being confident and being seen as arrogant.

This fear of crossing the line can hold back many highly intelligent women.

In fact, a study found that women, more than men, fear appearing arrogant and tend to downplay their intelligence as a result.

This fear can manifest in various ways – not speaking up in meetings, not sharing ideas, or even dumbing down conversations.

It’s like they’re trying to dim their light so others won’t feel outshone.

But it’s important to remember that it’s not arrogance to recognize and embrace your intelligence.

It’s okay to shine your light bright. After all, true confidence is not about dismissing others but about acknowledging your own value while respecting others.

4) Avoiding risks

Risk-taking is often a sign of confidence. But for highly intelligent women who lack self-confidence, stepping out of their comfort zone can feel like a leap too far.

They may stick to what they know and avoid new challenges for fear of failure.

This could mean staying in a job they’ve outgrown or not pursuing an exciting opportunity because it feels too risky.

This risk-averse behavior can stem from a fear of making mistakes. But what’s often overlooked is that mistakes are just stepping stones on the path to success.

Embracing risks and potential failures can be a game-changer. It’s about turning the ‘what if I fall?’ into ‘what if I fly?’. So don’t let the fear of failure clip your wings. 

5) Seeking validation

At the heart of it all, isn’t that what we all crave? A little validation, a little nod that we’re on the right path, a simple confirmation that we’re good enough.

For highly intelligent women with low self-confidence, this need for validation can be amplified.

They may constantly seek approval from others – be it their boss, their partner, or even their friends.

It’s like a thirst that’s hard to quench. They find themselves working overtime to meet impossible standards, or bending over backwards to please others, all in the hopes of getting that elusive pat on the back.

But here’s a little secret – you don’t need anyone else’s validation. You are enough, just as you are. Your worth is not dependent on someone else’s approval.

So give yourself the validation you’re seeking. Celebrate your achievements, acknowledge your efforts, and most importantly, believe in yourself.

Because at the end of the day, your opinion about yourself is what truly matters.

6) Perfectionism

It’s an all-too-familiar trap. The idea that if something isn’t perfect, it isn’t good enough. I’ve found myself caught in this snare more times than I’d like to admit.

I’d spend hours poring over a project, nitpicking every detail until it was ‘perfect’.

But the truth is, perfection is an illusion. It’s a never-ending chase with no finish line.

This tendency towards perfectionism is prevalent among highly intelligent women with low self-confidence.

They set impossibly high standards for themselves and feel crushed when they don’t meet them.

It’s important to remember that progress is more important than perfection. It’s about learning, growing, and improving along the way.

7) Fear of judgment

The fear of judgment can be a heavy burden to bear. For highly intelligent women with low self-confidence, this fear can sometimes dictate their actions.

They might hold back their thoughts or ideas in a group for fear of being ridiculed. They may avoid certain situations where they feel they’ll be judged or criticized.

This fear can create an invisible barrier that prevents them from fully expressing themselves or reaching their full potential.

It’s like living in a cage of other people’s opinions.

But the truth is, judgment is inevitable. There will always be people who judge or criticize, no matter what you do.

The key is to not let the fear of judgment control you. It’s your life, your choices. You have the power to break free from this cage and embrace your true self

8) Underestimating their worth

This is perhaps the most significant behavior displayed by highly intelligent women with low self-confidence – they often underestimate their worth.

They may question their value, downplay their capabilities, and undervalue their contributions.

It’s like they’re looking at themselves through a distorted mirror that doesn’t reflect their true brilliance.

But here’s the thing – your worth is not determined by how others perceive you, but by how you perceive yourself.

You’re more than your accomplishments, your failures, or the opinions of others.

You are enough, just as you are. And the moment you start to believe it, that’s when you will start to see your true worth.

Final thoughts

Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

This powerful quote resonates deeply with our topic. Your self-confidence, your self-worth, rests in your own hands.

So, whether you’re questioning your decisions, seeking validation, or underestimating your worth – remember, you are enough, just as you are.

The power to believe in yourself lies within you.

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Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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